An Unspoken Rule?

Apparently not.

I thought people knew better, but I guess not.

This week someone asked me if I was pregnant.  This was not someone that I know well.  It was actually quite a random person.  I replied politely “No, it’s just this outfit” and the person (Again who is not a good friend, just a random person) replied “No really, you really have a cute little baby belly”.  I again maintained my composure and replied “No, it’s the outfit” and then the person looked a little confused and just said “Oh.”.

Sigh.  To this random person, I say “Thanks so much for pretty much just calling me fat!”.  I really wanted to reply after the first time “No, I’m not pregnant, just obese”; however, given the situation in which this occured, it was not the appropriate time to be rude/ignorant, even though this person clearly was….

Considering I will be hanging out on a beach in 10 days, I’m pretty depressed about this.  Clearly I have gut or someone wouldn’t mistake me from being pregnant.  Again, I know I have gained weight since my injury, but I was not feeling that down in the dumps about it.

I’ve lost just over 6 lbs since January and have really been working hard the last few weeks to make healthier choices.  I’ve been up and down a bit sin, e the New Year, but since the third week of March, I am finally able to consume between 1900-2200 calories a day without wanting to chew my arm off in hunger.  It seemed to take a long time after my half ironman before I could eat below 2400 without feeling bitchy and hypoglycemic.  It is coming off very slowly and I have a lot of work to do in the abdominal region, which I know is going to take core work, time in the gym and cardio, which will have to wait until my asthma is better controlled unfortunately.  For now, I’m planning to continue to focus on eating healthy between now and when I leave for Mexico in 10 days.

I’ve got about 6 more pounds to go until I’m back to my half ironman weight and I would ideally like to lose another 5-10 after that just because I gained weight during half ironman training….  But for now, I will focus on one day at a time and try not to let this one person’s comment from totally derailing my progress.  I don’t mind it being a slow progress as long as I keep moving in the right direction.

January Goals

To help me get focused for my 2013 goals (coming shortly), I’m going back to monthly goals! A long long time ago I used to do these and I’m pretty excited about bringing them back!

edit: Jan 31 – didn’t quite get all of my goals accomplished, but I think it is a good start to the New Year.  I ran into some back pain and then I was sick for almost a week.  Regardless of reasons or excuses, I will continue with monthly goals to try and keep me focused towards the end goal of getting back into my regular fitness routine.

1. Swim 5 times.
I have been slack on the swimming lately. It’s not a big goal but just want to get some laps at the pool 5 times this month with no predetermined workout, time or distance in mind.
Progress – 2 swim (pool was closed for 4 days of Jan… not really an excuse, but…)

2. Run 9 times.
I’ve been averaging twice a week so I think this is more than achievable. It always depends on my knee, but I think I’m making good progress (knock on wood).
Progress – 9 runs!  DID IT!

3. One run of 6 km.
I’m up to doing 4 km now and it’s going well. I think doing 6 km at least once is achievable in January.
Progress – I did it!!!  I ran 6 km on the 28th of Jan.  It was not the easiest and it was slow, but it went well and I had no knee pain afterwards.

4. Bike 6 times.
Of course this will be on the trainer. I’m still doing only short and easy trainer rides but getting one to two in a week. Again, not a stretch goal but more about consistency.
 Progress – 5 bike rides.  Could have been better, could have been worse.

5. Complete spinervals 101.
I think by the end of January, if all goes well with the knee, I can start doing trainer videos again… I have two 35 min coach Troy videos so I will start with one of those. I’m currently doing 24 mins on the trainer.
Progress – Dealt with backpain in the middle of the month which siderailed this goal.  I will try again in Feb.

6. Yoga once weekly
Again, more about consistency. I’ve been pretty good with this through November and December so I just want to keep the momentum going.
Progress – I fell off the yoga bandwagon during Christmas holidays and it was difficult to get back on.  I did do yoga DVD at home twice.

7. Weights/Core 8 times.
Same as #6… Just trying to keep the momentum going.
Progress – 8 sessions complete.  I DID IT!

8. Hold a plank (elbows & toes) for 65 seconds. (My current personal best is 60 seconds). revised this goal on Jan 1 as I held a plank for 60 seconds before the end of Dec!
Progress – still only able to get to 60 seconds.  Frustrating that I seem stuck on 60 seconds.  I know it is all mental and have to break through that barrier

9. Complete 9 full push-ups in a row (current personal best is 7).
Progress: Jan 3 – feeling weak as I could only get to 4 😦 ); Jan 7 – 8!; Jan 10 – 8!; Jan 15 – did 12!!!  SO HAPPY that I reached this goal!!!

10. Stretch 25 days.
 Progress –  stretched 14/31  (Still better than what I was doing last year this time, but I need to be very careful not to slide off the stretching bandwagon!

11. Complete Physio exercises at least 16 times.
Progress – 14/31 days

12. Eat a minimum of 5 servings of fruit/veg for 21 days.
Progress – 19/31 days (including a streak of 6 days in a row!!!)  I am happy with this.  This goal was a great way for me to consciously eat more fruits and veggies

13. Floss daily
a gross one but I hate flossing so much and prefer to skip it.
Progress – I’d rather nto talk about it.  Maybe if I make an appt with the dentist, I will follow through with this better….

14. Do not use credit card for purchases.
I have been using it more than I feel comfortable with lately, so I am putting it away! I need to get back to saving for those bigger ticket items rather than using credit.
Progress- Ugh.  I didn’t do horrible, but I failed this goal.  I went on a scrapbooking supply spending splurge and spent way more than I intended and out came the visa.  I also used it for a small purchase of dog supplies when I left my debit card at home.  I used it when we were out for dinner once as well, but paid that part off right away.  I put way less than I normally do per month on it, so I will celebrate that success.  I’m planning to hide it away in a drawer in Feb to help me become more succesful at this goal.

15. Pack and eat a healthy work lunch on 85% of workdays.
Progress – I did this 100% of the time!

16. Finish Sidney’s scrapbook
I’m about 80% done so this one will hopefully be easy.
DONE!!! 🙂

17. Ski 4 times
This is mostly weather dependent and based on my injury & fatigue.
Progress – Skied only twice.  The weather was either freezing (sub -30 C or warm and the snow was melting).  Combine that with the bad back and illness there just was not much opportunity to do this.

18. Take a photo every day and post on http://luckytiffphoto365.wordpress.com/
added on Jan 1/13
Progress – YES 🙂

19. Read 2 books ( half way through Aaesop’s Fables and just started Little Women …. classics but good reads so far!) Added on Jan 2/13
Progress – I don’t think I will reach this goal.  I’m close to finishing one, but not even close on the other….  My kobo battery died and I can’t find the charger so I need to look for that.

Wow. That’s a lot of goals. Hopefully I can stay focused….. I think I should print these out and post them somewhere….

Progress:  I only fully met 8 of my 19 goals.  It was a good way to start the year however, and given the obstacles this month will illness, back pain, weather and an unexpected road trip, I don’t think it went that terribly.  Gives me something to build on for Feb as well.

15 Weeks

15 weeks ago I went for a run on a Sunday morning with no plan in mind but to just enjoy it.  And I did.  I ran 8 km and it felt great!  I had no idea that a few days later I would suffer a devastating injury that would take months of recovery and rehab.  I realize that there is not much different I could have done to prevent my injury and that it was a combination of tight muscles (stretch more next time), weak hips (strength train/core exercises next time), anatomy (shallow patellar groove), poor biomechanics (improved with core/strengthening?) and the abnormal movement (walking downstairs in a twisting motion?).  It happened.  Analyzing it in to obliion will never change that.  I can learn from this exeperience and I think I already have.

I am slowly healing.  While on our vacation, we did a LOT of walking and a lot of standing.  My knee was definitely aggravated at times.  I taped it with KT tape for a good portion of the vacation and that helped.  One day I was having an extraordinary amount of knee, hip and back pain.  I realized that my gait was deteroriating and I was falling back to my old ways of loosey goosey poor biomechanics.  I fixed that and it helped tremendously although I had to really think about it once I got fatigued. 

I’ve been doing my prescribed exercises.  In the beginning I was religious about them.  On vacation, I slacked big time but still did them every second day, so better than nothing.  I stretched and did some yoga poses at the airport (got some interesting looks), I stretched and did the physio exercises that I could do standing with minimal room while in lineup for rides.  It helped. 

I have definitely used this injury also as an excuse to be lazy and eat whatever.  I am gaining weight at an exponential rate.  Every fall I experience weight gain, but it is more significant this year as I creep up closer to my highest weight ever and that doesn’t impress me.  So instead of continuing to wallow in my self pity, I am going to do something about it.  Gone are the days of a chocolate bar almost every day and second servings for dinner (unless I am truly and honestly still hungry, not just eating seconds because the food is so tasty!).  No more mindless snacking.  No more slacking on exercise or my physio exercises.  I know that small changes are what will make the difference and also that the small changes will be easier to maintain over time.  I have to start this now because if not, I will not have any work pants that fit!  In fact, after that vacation, I may already be in dire trouble in that department… 

Shifting Focus

I am usually not a negative person, but throughout this injury, I have totally been a debbie downer, negative nancy or whatever you want to call it. 

I probably should have done this a long time ago, and I’m sure I have tried, but now I need to try harder.  I need to shift the focus of this injury and stop focusing on what I can’t do.  I need to start focusing on what I CAN do.

I was really sad about it snowing, not because I don’t like snow, but because I can’t ski.  I mean cross country skiing.  Yes, I only do classic… however, I’m really bad at it and I fall a lot.  So until I am fully healed, I don’t think it is a good idea to hit the trails.  Then I had an “aha” moment!  I CAN snowshoe!  It’s low impact and it is an awesome workout for the glutes, which is one of the weak areas I am working on with my physio.  Also, I don’t fall often.  So it would be the perfect thing to do through this rehab.

I missed some great end of summer and fall running, biking and mountain biking.  So that does suck.  There’s no way that I can word or phrase this so that it doesn’t suck.  However, there will more summers and falls full of running, trail running, hiking, road biking and mountain biking in my future as long as I properly rehab from this injury and then practice prevention.

I can’t run or bike a lot yet, but I can swim.  I have discovered that I don’t really like swimming.  It’s my least favourite of the three sports.  But I can do it.  And although I wouldn’t say I’m getting any better at it, I can at least do it.  I got in 3 swims this past week and that felt pretty good!

I can do yoga.  I am improving my yoga all the time which is good.  Again, something I’m not very good at, but I enjoy it.

I can do my stupid rehab exercises.  Ok, they are not stupid.  They are just so boring.  I usually do them while watching television.

I am getting better.  Even though this past week I had significant pain and swelling, it was still way less than a month ago and for that, I am grateful.  I’ve been walking my dog everyday and this makes her happy!

I was hoping to be running this weekend, but after the increase in pain and swelling this past week, I decided it was probably not the smartest idea.  I see my physiotherapist again on Wednesday, so we will get his two cents and it feels better today so maybe if it stays that way until then, we will do some running together.  I HOPE!

Finally, I am getting fat.  No, I am not exaggerating.  I’m up 10 lbs since my race.  I keep losing and gaining the same 3-4 pounds over and over again.  It’s because I am eating like crap.  No exaggeration.  I’m standing for a wedding in April and we are going to buy bridesmaid’s dresses this week… that may be the kick in the pants I need to stop fooling around and pay attention to my diet….  That and the fact that I’m going to florida in 11 days and most likely none of my shorts will fit me… except the ones with a stretchy band (ie running shorts)….  So for the next 11 days, I’m going to try and eat healthy throughout the day (skipping lunch often unintentionally has been part of the problem) and avoid the Halloween candy and then while on vacation I will try not to gain any weight…

The Marathon Dream

For the second year in a row, I did not get lucky for the NYC marathon lottery.  I’m ok with this.  I remember last year, I was relieved as that meant I didn’t have to spend my Ireland vacation doing long runs and being in the midst of training.  This year, I am a little more disappointed for a few reasons.  For one, I actually requested vacation and I’m pretty sure it’s going to get approved.  Secondly, my mother got approved for vacation and we were going to make a vacation out of it.  Ok.  I guess there are only two reasons.  At first, I decided that I was going to do a fall marathon regardless.  Now, I am second thinking that. 

Co-existing with my marathon dream is my half ironman dream and my Ironman dream and dreams of lots of travelling!  I thought about other fall marathons but I don’t want to go somewhere I’ve been before (ie. Vegas Marathon) and I didn’t want to be doing 30+km runs in Decemeber (ie. Walt Disney World Marathon).  I feel like anything in October would be too early and I won’t have time to properly train once I take a week off after my half ironman.  So…. I’m considering calling my race season in July and at most doing a 10k or maybe (a very slim chance) an October half marathon.  I’m going to spend the fall doing a little bit of running, swimming and biking… and a lot of yoga, strength training and other activities to mix it up before jumping into Ironman training next winter.  I’m going to focus more on dropping the weight in the fall as well…. as I am hoping this will be easier when I’m not in training for something.

I am totally fine with tabling my marathon dream for another year (or maybe two!) because I am constanly doing amazing things with my body and hitting new personal bests for distances biked, distances swam, weekly mileage, weekly training hours, etc.  I am always improving and I am always striving to be a better, fitter, healthier, happier version of myself.

On a travel note…. any ideas for somewhere that’s nice to visit in November (preferably in North America just because we only have 7 days off and it would be a shame to spend more than a day travelling to get there.  We’re considering Floriday, but is it still hurricane season in November?

A weighty Issue

I’ve pretty much been up and down the same 5 lbs since Christmas.  I haven’t been eating well at all.  I’m about 12 lbs heavier then the end of last summer right now and I am not one bit happy about it.  I’m not obsessing about it or bashing my body, but I just realize that I have to do something about it.  The last few weeks, I’ve noticed that I’m putting more effort to maintain the same pace when running and I think it has a lot to do with these extra pounds.  Either way, it can’t hurt to clean up my eating a little.  I suspect that if I just cut out all the chocolate and beer I can lose about half of what I’ve gained in 2 weeks or less!  haha.  I wish I was joking but I was not joking when I said I have been eating like crap!

So it’s back to tracking what I’m eating, if nothing else, so I can be MINDFUL of what I am shovelling into my mouth.  I also need to work on making sure I eat an afternoon snack because otherwise I am dragging ass by the time my day is over and it’s time to get my workout on!

So that’s it.  That’s all I will say about it.

January is Over?

Wow, that went fast! January is a bit of a blur for me! I felt like it was a fairly strong training month and I can only imagine how much better it would have been if I hadn’t been sick so often!

I ran 170 km! I ran more in January than I did in any one month in 2011! That’s exciting for me! Actually, after looking back on old training logs, it’s my highest mileage month for running ever! And honestly I feel great!!! Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been tired and ha ridiculously trashed legs, but I feel like I recovered well. Most of the mileage is long and slow runs, very little speed work. Also, I am pretty certain that I did most of my runs on the treadmill due to icy road conditions and -40 temps.

I biked for just over 10 hours on the trainer or at spin class. I’m estimating distance to be around 250km. This is an awesome start for triathlon training for me! During my oly tri, I felt like I was strong on the bike, even if I did have to back off the intensity a little. I need to feel that way at the 70 km mark of my half iron as well!

For swimming, I swam just under 12 km. A strong month for me, especially since I skipped some swims due my sinus pain/infection.

I did zero yoga in January but I did make it a point to do stretching on a more regular basis!

Weight… Well I’d rather not talk about it. Feeling down in the dumps about it especially since I realized that I’m 15lbs heavier than I was 3 years ago this time (at which time I was trying to lose 8 lbs for what reason I do not know!). I have been self sabotaging a lot this week and last week do just trying to get back on the rails. Mostly, I can’t beat myself up. I’m doing great with my Training and I’m getting stronger!

January was a great training month and I’m not sure I will improve on it in February. I know for sure the running mileage will be lower as I plan to up intensity and decrease mileage in the weeks leading up to my half! I guess that is all I have to say for now

Half Ironman Training, Week 3

If you need to catch up to speed, go check out Week 1 and Week 2!

Well, unfortunately, this week also sucked.  I still did almost as much as plan called for (except for the swimming which I found aggravated my sinus pressure/pain, so I only did one swim).  Like I said in my last couple of posts, it was a matter of listening to my body because of this illness.  Today I feel much better than I have the past couple days, but just felt very tired and dragged out, so I cut my run short (12 km instead of 18) and took a nap instead of going to the pool.

Eating this week has not been good.  At all.  It started well but as I started feeling more and more miserable, the eating went to crap.  I used my illness as a way to feel sorry for myself and allow myself the extra helping at dinner than I didn’t need or the chocolate that I have been trying to avoid.  As a result, I gained 1.8 lb and I totally deserved that.  Hopefully I can take it off this week as I get back on track. 

I just really hope this is not a sign of what is to come with my training.  I’m trying to keep a positive attitude and see it as a minor road block.  Now that I am being treated, I should be back to my normal self in a couple of days.  This week is a recovery week and aside from ramping up the running, I do intend to decrease biking and swimming volume.

No strength training or yoga this week. 

Swim = 1500m  (it was a great swim except after I felt like my sinuses were going to explode)
Bike = 49 km (estimated.  Trainer and spin class)
Run = 38 km

Only did 10 min of stretching.  Bad me!  But I did do an hour of cross country skiing and I loved it!

This post feels like a bit of a downer, but I just hate feeling under the weather and I am kicking myself for not getting treatment earlier.  Next week I will be peppier, I guarantee it!

Week 1 of Half Ironman Training!

… is complete!  And I survived it!  Of course, I am modifying it a little bit as I am doing a half marathon next month, but it was a great week!  I swam 2850m, biked 77 km (all estimated as it is all indoor training at this point in time) and ran 37 km (unfortunately, all on the treadmill due to icy conditions and now very very cold temperatures).  I also did my usual Core Condition Class and did 20 minutes of strength training on my own.  I am keeping up with the stretching and did a total of 70 minutes of stretching over the week.  I honestly think that is going to help me tremendously with my recovery! 

I did not fit in a yoga class this week.   I am really missing yoga, but just finding it difficult to fit it into my routine.  I am happy that I have done a lot of stretching the last 2 weeks and I definitely incorporate some yoga poses with my stretching, especially pigeon pose.  I find that pose to really help me feel the stretch through my cranky old lady hip and into the glute.  I discovered the foam roller this week!  Ummm… wow!  Why didn’t anybody let me in on this little secret before?  I have been using one at the gym and I am hoping to actually buy one in the next few weeks so I can roll at home.  It has really helped with some of those tight muscles!

Another fun fact of the week!  I did some strength training on my own.  I am pretty clueless, so I just wing it.  I get bored easily, so it usually only lasts for 20 minutes, but at least it is something.  Usually I do a few moves from my core class and I was definitely feeling sore the next day so that is good.  I decided to do some push-ups…. full push-ups, no on your knees crap!  I did 3 sets and managed to do 2, 4 and 2 in each set.  I was surprised that I could even complete one full one, so to do 4 in a row is awesome!  I would like to be able to do 10 in a row by my birthday in April.  I think that is easily achieveable.

Motivation was a little difficult this week.  I just got to the point where I would just drag myself to the gym and then I would be fine.  I think all this indoor training is bumming me out!  I want to be outdoors!  It snowed this weeked, so that is good!!  I’m hoping that it will provide traction on the ice so that I can run without fear of falling and breaking a bone.  Also, if there is enough AND if it can warm up to -20 Celsius (presently -24 with a windchill of -37 Celsius), then I can break out the cross country skis again!!!

In the end for motivation, I remind myself why I do this.  I do it because I love it!  Sure, sometimes it’s hard to fit in or I feel lazy and would almost rather zone out in front of the tele for the evening rather than run for an hour…. but in the end, I’m always happier when I get my workout in!

Oh!  And weight-wise, tracking everything really worked for me this week.  I ate between 1900 and 3200 calories every day, avoided “junk” food, did not consume any alcohol and tried to choose good foods.  I managed to lose 3 lbs!  Really pumped about that.  I am trying to focus on food as fuel for the training I am doing and that is helping.  I indulged yesterday by eating a chocolate bar (my first of 2012) and a beer.  Today, I am ready to rock it! 

Today starts Week 2!  In 27 weeks, I will be crossing the finish line of my first half ironman!  Visualize it and believe it!

 

Inner Couch Potato Vs. Inner Athlete

It’s only more recently that I have started to accept that there actually is an inner athlete inside of me begging to bust on out of there!  After 3 years of consistent running and other exercise, you would think I would now be ok to consider myself an athlete.  And yet, I struggle to say those words outloud sometimes.  That being said, it took a very long time before I considered myself a “runner”… probably not until the middle of last year and I was already running quite regularly for 2 years by that time!  This past summer I was introduced by a friend as being a “triathlete” and it just didn’t seem right to me for some reason…. almost like it didn’t seem real! 

I truly think that sometimes you tend to get stuck with labels and that can make you fall back into your old belief system and old habits.  Old habits die hard.  When you have been telling yourself something for years, eventually it does become true, because you make it a self-fulfilling prophecy.  I often look back at myself as being “The Fat Kid with Asthma”.  In reality, I did grow up being slightly overweight (but honestly not that bad until university and even then, it was an extra 20-40 lb, hardly “FAT”).  I did struggle with asthma as a child and it is something that, unfortunately, I continue to struggle with.  I have good days, I have a bad days.  But I no longer let that define me!  I manage my asthma with the tools I have and I self-monitor and work with my physician to change my medication so that it WON’T hold me back!  I only finally let go of that label after running a half marathon last year in extremely smoky and poor air quality conditions and ended up running a personal best!  Sadly, I know that it was not the smartest move for me and it is not something I will do again in the future; however, it was a great lesson in breaking through mental barriers that sometimes prevent us from reaching our full potential.

Then there is the “Inner Couch Potato” …. don’t we all have one?  That small voice that whispers into our ear to skip just this one workout, kick back and have some chocolate and wine while wasting away in front of your television!  Sometimes, the voice is not so small.  I’m certainly not saying that it is not okay to relax; because it totally is!  Personally, I LOVE TO RELAX!  I am not going to lie about that.  I may not watch a lot of TV, but I love to browse the internet, lounge on the sofa with a good book and great coffee and just not even worry about the passage of time.  And there is a time and a place for that.  There can also be a time and place for that to fit into daily life…. but that comes after my workout!  This week, I battled my inner couch potato on Monday.  Monday morning I had planned a swim and totally did not set an alarm.  I woke up, on my own, 45 minutes after my alarm should have sounded and decided instead of rushing like crazy to get to the pool for a 20 minute swim (which is all I would have time for), I decided to snooze a little longer and enjoy my morning.  I do not like to rush.  After work on Monday, I came home and spent some time with my puppy and started to debate about going to my Core Conditioning Class that I attend weekly.  I started to make excuses in my head.  I stopped.  I got ready, I got in my car and I went.  I hated every minute of it up until I got to class and started talking with the other people there and the instructor and I had realized…. Score One for Inner Athlete!

There are also times when you just have to listen to your body.  But sometimes, it is not quite clear what it is telling you.  I nearly fell on Tuesday heading in to work…. after a few funny moves, I managed to make it in ok.  I was determined not to spill my coffee and I succeeded in that, but I also tweaked every muscle in my body.  As is usual for me, the complaining parts were all on the right side; mostly my lower back and hip, but also my shoulder, calf and ankle.  I was debating after work whether I should take it easy or run.  It was an intense debate.  In the end, I decided to go and run for 10 minutes and then do a body check to see how I was doing.  I knew the danger in this was ignoring that part and not checking to see how I was feeling and pushing through the pain (which is sometimes good, but is it pain from working out or borderline getting injured… it’s a fine line).  I got to the gym, felt great, and had my best run in a really long time actually!  Afterwards, I took 20 minutes to stretch and the next day, I felt back to my normal self!  You have to listen really closely sometimes to discover what your body is trying to say.

According Webster’s Dictionary, an Athlete is “a person who is trained or skilled in exercises, sports, or games requiring physical strength, agility, or stamina “.  I am still not sure if I am there yet, but I know that every single day is a learning experience and I only plan to get better with time!